A letter from myself

Before, I always laughed when my mother would tell me that a boyfriend would be endlessly time-consuming and dangerous, but now I know why my parents tell me the things they do tell us - because they went through the same experiences and same desires, and they know how enjoyable these things can be. I don't mean to tag that adjective, enjoyable, with any unpleasant connotation - because that's just the thing. Dalliance is a dangerous thing only in that it's so enjoyable and easy to practice for longer than need be - not because of the moral stain it would have on your character.

Take two pianists

One composes fairly well, and one plays well.

The innovator plays on and on, with a different emotion each time, leaving an imprint on his song. Every piece is another piece of the innovator, at one specific moment in time and space and life, captured into notes on a piano.

The pianist is admired, but...

...the innovator is loved.

I'm still learning that there are different types of love.

...and different types of people, and feelings, and people. I don't understand why I'm here and why I'm doing what I'm doing, but it feels different and lovely in its difference.

can flowers have preservatives in them?

cause this bouquet of flowers has long outlasted its expected life-span of two or three days. what a persevering set of bright orange lilies. i'm convinced that they're made of wax and love.

it's a wonder that so many things, like ever-lasting flowers, exist in some corner of the world. maybe we can have ever-lasting childhood too, or ever-lasting friendship. i'd put some preservatives in it and call it a day.

it's like a race against time

trying to type things out before a laptop battery hits 0%. and there it goes - 17 minutes left, 18% remaining - but then again, laptop battery life fluctuates so much that nothing really means anything.

maybe i've gone crazy this summer, but it's a sweet sense of craziness that you can only get once every four years, once in every transition between lives. i'm glad. in a way.